LIZA

Written by Liza.

Names have been changed to protect privacy.

Where should I begin?

My name is Liza and I'm 26 years old and I have 3 wonderful daughters: Holley, Heidi, and Heather. I'm divorced from their dad. I'd been seeing this guy for just over a year and we'd talked about marriage and having kids of our own. But the day I told him I was pregnant he freaked out and all he could say was. "Have an abortion." From that moment I knew that this baby would be placed for adoption. Then I talked to my ex-husband about what to say to our 3 girls and he told me to be 100% honest with them throughout the whole pregnancy and placement. So I told the girls about the pregnancy and that this baby was given to Mommy to carry for someone else. This baby was for someone whose belly was broken and couldn't have babies like Mommy.

My oldest is 8 and she understood pretty well. My 5 year old had a lot of questions like, "Why I didn't give her away." My answer was that God gave her to me to keep, like He did with her 2 sisters; she was happy with that answer. My 3 year old is too young to understand but I'm sure she'll have questions in the future.

I wasn't sure where to start looking for adoption, but I went to my ex-husband's place to see my kids and I started searching the Internet. That's when I found the Christian Adoption website. I started looking at profiles and I read every couple's letter. I emailed a few of them, but kept going back to one couple. I decided to call them one night and we talked for a couple hours! We talked often, but one night I received an email from them that I should call immediately. That night I was shocked to hear that they had just adopted another baby. At first I was upset but I decided to pray for God's help. Deborah, the administrator of Christian Adoption, called me and eased my mind. She told me about some of the new couples on the website; her encouragement got me up and going again. I had new hope to find the right couple for my baby. My Mom said we could keep the baby, but I said, "Mom, there's no way. I'm not with the guy that got me pregnant and I can't bring a baby into this house and put the burden on you," and my Mom agreed.

I made some calls to some people instead of going back to Christian Adoption. My Aunt had a friend that knew someone wanting to adopt; my ex-husband gave me the name of an adoption agency. I called many people, I did a lot of investigating and a lot of praying. (I later found out that all the Christian Adoption Family was praying for me too!) I went back to the Christian Adoption website and emailed 4 couples. I let them all know they could ask me anything and everyone emailed back with their questions. I answered their questions and realized I had some questions to ask them too. I was able to narrow down my choices to one couple, based upon their answers. After reading the other birthmom testimonies, I knew in my heart who I wanted to adopt my baby, so I sent them an e-card asking them to call me. When Tina called I told her that I wanted her and Rick to adopt my baby. We almost cried, but I said something funny to change the mood and we talked for another hour. Rick and Tina came to meet me and we had a great time together. The only thing that didn't work out was the baby didn't want to move while they were here! My family got tired of hearing me talk about our visit, but that meeting confirmed my decision. A couple weeks later I had an ultrasound and learned my baby was a boy. I told Rick and Tina and I started telling my friends. Many of them asked me how I felt about placing my first boy? I told them, "I can give this boy all the love in the world, but love isn't all that's needed to raise a child. It takes a lot more than just love. So for the welfare of the baby, it would be better for him to go to another family. They'll be more able to care for him than me. This baby boy is very blessed-he'll have 2 families that love him!"

I'm very close with Rick and Tina. I look forward to talking to them, it always cheers me up even if I don't need cheering up. We have such a great time talking! They are the answer to my prayers. Thankfully the time has gone by fast. Being pregnant is uncomfortable but a joy at the same time. Life goes on and now I see the Dr. every week and he's going to induce my labor, so Rick and Tina can be here for the birth. We talk every Tuesday after my Dr. appt, so I can give them updates on the baby's progress.  

The morning of my inducement, my Mom and I went to the hospital and Nurse Karen took me to my room. She gave me the ugliest gown ever to put on and she was very supportive of my adoption plan. I climbed onto the bed and she started the IV; a few minutes later Rick and Tina arrived! I could tell they were  nervous and excited. At 9 Am they started the PIT (pitocin) to begin labor. At 10:15 Am I felt my first contraction. Getting through labor is tough at times, but when you have people to help you it's a lot easier. Having Tina there for me was great-just holding her hand helped me so much. Around 4 Pm the hard labor started and Tina stayed by my side the whole time, while Rick waited outside. Then he came into the room because he knew this was a once in a lifetime experience. At 5:34 Pm, my baby that I carried for Rick and Tina was born. The moment he was born and I saw Rick and Tina's face, I knew I'd made the right decision for this wonderful baby. I could see their joy and their awe; I knew how I felt when my girls were born and they felt the same way. I knew how they felt with so many emotions and excitement. This baby has been their prayer for so very long and I knew that God gave me this baby to carry for them.

Afterwards they were so great. I held my/their son and I watched them walk to their car to drive to their motel. That was a special moment, as I could see their faces glowing with happiness. The next day when I left the hospital my Mom and I stopped by their motel to take some pictures of all of us together. I'll always treasure these pictures. Not only was I able to start a family for some wonderful people, but I also have 2 wonderful friends for life. I will always hold Rick and Tina close to my heart. Now the 4 of us have a deep bond that can't ever be broken. Thanks to God that bond is real and true.

My baby is loved and well cared for, my 3 girls are happy and healthy, I have a wonderful future ahead of me.

God is very good.

Liza

For more information please read Tina.

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